D.C. in the Spring

Welcome to my blog. Insert dork joke/you are not the sports guy joke/Jewish people can't play sports so they write about it....joke. Now that we got that out of the way, here is a short intro. I was born and raised in LA, have family from Boston and New York, went to Duke, worked for Fox Sports West in Los Angeles, and now live in DC. You will know my sports allegiances quickly, and trust me you won't like it. Anyway, lets get to it.

Here are some thoughts on D.C. sports in the spring. First, let me say how great it is to be living in D.C. during this great era in sports. Wait...what? What I meant to say was that rooting for the D.C. sports teams is like watching the 7th season of 24. It is all exciting before the season starts, but in the end you know whats going to happen. Yet somehow you are still surprised when an American turns out to be a terrorist and defends himself by claiming that he was doing it for to save the good ole US of A. Take the Redskins as an example. Every year, except maybe 2008, and I am not counting Jason Taylor as a potential team savior, the Skins have a huge off-season. Yet every year, the over-priced fat asses eat five guys out of a business before sucking it up on the field. And every year the experts and the fans, including myself, think that this year will be different. Guess what, if Haynesworth comes into the preseason weighing less than the polar bear in Germany who tried to eat the dumbest woman alive, I will be stoked. In fact, I will be happier than Josh Howard on 4/20, and no, not because they are going to beat the Spurs who are older than the Alamo.

And just when you think it can't get any worse, the talk of Dan Snyder having a man crush on Sanchez is on the front page. AWESOME. I am a USC fan and this is a dumb idea. He may be a great QB, who knows. But guess what, no one is a good QB when they are lying on the ground with Demarcus Ware's foot in their ass. I swear to god, if the Skins do not draft someone over 300 lbs in the first round someone should send Snyder a cake with a naked midget in it who looks like Gus Ferrote who jumps out and head butts him in the junk. I mean c'mon, Snyder, stick to what you to best, money and .....well money.

Now onto the Natinals. No that is not a spelling error. It is bad enough that they blew leads in the 9th on Saturday and Sunday, but to cap it off, they couldn't even spell their names right on their jerseys. Natinals? Really? In addition to sending 3 pitchers down to the minors on Sunday you should have also sent down the printer or whoever is in charge of making the jerseys. I understand that we are in a recession, but maybe leave out the S, or even the als and just be Nation. Hell maybe thats what they should do. If they are lucky people will think they are the Red Sox Nation's minor league baseball team. Instead they are treated like the drunk kid at the party who just threw up on himself, you feel bad for him, yet you can't stop for 30 seconds to help him because you are laughing so hard.

Now to the Wizards.....this should be quick. Combine overpriced players with an owner who doesn't know what the fuck he is doing, and ta da.....welcome to the worst team in the NBA. The Mystics could have won more games....ummm...ok maybe I took that one a little far, but I bet that Mystic fan agrees with me.

Finally, the shining star that is D.C. sports, the Caps. I love Ovechkin. Fun to root for, has incredible energy, and gives the fans something to watch, besides the 10 goals that are being scored on Jose Threeormore (a quick thanks to Mr Dubin). Now if I described a team as high scoring, exciting to watch, has an MVP yet continously loses in the playoffs what would your first answer be. The Phoenix Suns? Exactly. The Caps are the Suns of the NHL. Great team with great talent that can put points/goals up on anyone, that is until they reach the playoffs. This team is just not meant for playoff hockey. When teams clog up the neutral zone, play conservative, and don't turn the puck over, it gets hard to score. And when you have bad goaltending and an average defensive team, you are going to struggle. Now hey, they are only down 2-0 and in hockey we all know that home ice doesn't mean shit, but even if they somehow squeeze by the Rangers they have as much chance of making it to the Stanley Cup as Chien-Ming Wang does of making it through the 2nd inning. Bam...now you know I am a sox fan.

And on that note let me say that nothing made me happier than seeing the Yankees open their new stadium with a loss, only to follow it up 2 days later with a 22-4 drubbing by the Indians.
Anyway, that is it for my first blog. I hope you enjoyed and I promise it will get better.

Finally, I would just like to say a few words about a friend of mine who was lost in a drunk driving accident. Henry Pearson was a man of potential. He was the guy that you knew was going to be successful no matter what he did and no matter where he did it. Henry, the world is a darker place without you. The sports world and my world will never be the same. Take care and may you rest in peace.